I’ve married three times for the wrong reasons –Charly Boy

Entertainer and activist, Charles Oputa , popularly called Charly Boy , made the news recently when he announced that he was going to divorce his wife and marry her the next day . The Area Fada actually acted true to his words as a marriage ceremony was held in honour of him and his wife of 40 years , Lady Diane .Speaking to Saturday Beats about the secret of his marriage of 40 years , Charly Boy noted that his ability to build a healthy friendship with his wife had kept his home together.

“ Marriage is a game of management and perseverance that young people find difficult to conform to . Life comes with its own problems ; one can never know what is around the corner . Even though a couple is compatible , there will still be some issues they don’ t agree on .

Friendship is what has kept my marriage peaceful .

“ When someone is your friend ; it will be easy to open up to such a person . To attain that kind of friendship , there has to be mutual respect between the two people . Addressing issues with openness makes life easy , every problem has a solution . I don’ t think some young people are willing to make all these sacrifices . They are always in hurry , they don’ t think about the future .

Oputa, who has been in three failed marriages , said he married the women he was involved with in those marriages for the wrong reasons .

“ I won ’ t add the conditions of my past marriages to my experience because my case is a little different . I have always seen my father and mother together in love even though they quarrelled and argued overtime . This made a big impression on me , I admired them . I loved those kinds of things .

“ I was not ready for marriage when my first marriage took place . My mother forced me to get married. I was busy impregnating people instead of reading my books , so my mother made sure I got married to curb my excesses as a teenager .

“ I was 19 , and my mother brought her to me . The second one was when I was in my 20 s , I wasn ’ t even ready as well , it was just to get myself settled in the US , but I later realised that the US wasn ’ t a place I could settle in . The marriage lasted for about three years , and I cut my stay in the US short because I experienced racism . I was almost killed because of the colour of my skin . Those things made me hate America ; my uncles never believed I would return to Nigeria . After the second marriage failed , I married the third woman in America for the wrong reason, ” he told Saturday Beats .

The entertainer said that he never knew he would be married to his current wife and he told Saturday Beats the details of his love story .

“ This is my fourth marriage ; I wasn ’ t even expecting to marry my wife . She came one day after we had been dating for a while and told me that if I didn ’ t marry her , she would leave me . I thought it was going to end like the others . We got married shortly after that with only one witness present at the registry .

“ That was all that we did ; there was no party at all and we are still together after 40 years . My parents didn ’ t even want me to marry someone who didn ’ t come from Nigeria . I was just against too many battles . I decided that my marriage must work . We have learnt how to manage ourselves through any kind of stormy weather . Marriage is not easy ; I can ’ t say I am living in paradise because I would be lying .

“ The essence of a true marriage is not about a flamboyant wedding . My father taught me the art of a simple life , I am happier that way . I used a tricycle to renew my vows because I am a simple person . Expensive things don’ t define me , money doesn ’ t move me , and I don’ t show off . I was implying that I wanted to renew my vows on December 15 ; some people didn ’ t get the joke . I was not trying to say I would actually divorce my wife and remarry someone else, I simply meant I wanted to renew my vows , ” he added .

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